Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-33154547-20150126113820/@comment-4794494-20150415010338

Something hilarious that someone posted on an internet forum about self-help:

'''So I was going to school, I'm in 8th grade, and I was on the bus. You see, I have no friends cause everyone makes fun of me. Anyway, I was sitting down in a seat and I dropped my bag next to me. I realized that I hadn't gone twosies in a while and my stomach started to make weird noises. I was droppin' bombs of fart and people started to move away from me. But then, my larger intestines started to make a loud noise, and WHAM! A piece of turd came flying out and left a big brown stain on my pants. I jerked myself backwards and landed on the back of the seat, which smashed the poop against my skin and made a squishing sound. Suddenly, more poop started to erupt from my butt and soon, my jeans were mostly brown. I took off my pants and then dropped them onto the ground. My undies weren't even recognizable anymore so I decided to take those off, too. Poop was rocketing out of me as I tried to get off the bus. The poop was dripping from me and people stayed away from the aisle. As I stepped off the bus, my stomach gave a final push, and a giant mass of turd blocked the entrance of the bus. My feet were covered with my own poop and I had effectively trapped my peers in a bus full of poop. I started to cry as the last bits of poop were shoved out of me. I started to weep in my own poop.

Guys, I hope you feel sympathy and this never happens to you :,( '''